Whales, Trees, Snails and Playgrounds

Last weekend was St. John's Day. Actually I think it was Monday, and it is a pretend holiday here. It's not a paid holiday, but many people take it off anyway. I'm not really sure what it is about, something to do with John Cabot making the first European discovery of the area on the Feast Day of St John. Hence that is how St. John's got its name, and it has its very own holiday. Good enough for me.
There were lots of activities in the city on the weekend. The pottery studio held an open house where people could come in and make something. In honour of St. John's, we set up a clay model of the hills around the harbour and invited people to make the city in clay. We expected lots of row houses and churches and landmarks of the city. We got a few houses from the adults that came through, but our clientele were overwhelmingly children, and when we suggested they make something in the city, we got some unexpected results.
It started well enough, one little girl made a playground complete with slide and monkey bars.
Another girl made an amazing model of the Basilica.
Someone made the Cabot Tower on Signal Hill.
Someone made a couple dozen cannons to guard Signal Hill even though there are no cannons on Signal Hill.
Someone made a whale for the harbour.
Several others made whales for the harbour.
A fisherman came through and made a boat for the harbour.
Several others made boats for the harbour.
One girl made lots of trees and planted them in Quidi Vidi Gut until we pointed out it was the ocean and perhaps she could transplant them to a hill instead.
Someone made an iceberg for the harbour. (At least that's what I think it was)
Someone made a swimming pool.
One very little girl made all the stop and yield signs for the streets (although we had no streets.)
Someone made a very large snail, about 10 times the size of the Cabot Tower and set it free in Quidi Vidi Lake. (I will admit this city has a lot of snails, and now apparently we also have our own version of the Loch Ness Monster too.)
A boy thought that was so much fun that he spent an hour making small slugs and throwing them all over the model. It looked like a mouse had come and crapped all over the city.
Another Basilica.
Another Cabot Tower.
More whales, trees, snails and playgrounds.
At the end of two days, we came to the conclusion that the next time this city is razed by fire, this is the children's vision of what should come next. No schools, no government buildings, no monuments, theatres, bars or shops.
Just whales, trees, snails and playgrounds. And lots of mouse crap.

Everything is Relative

It was like someone turned on a switch on the 21st of June and TADA we got summer. The last four days have been warm and sunny and I am WEARING A TANK TOP!!!!!
Of course, every silver lining has a cloud and Monday, on the hottest day I have yet to experience in NL, I was sent with crew of 2 young and tender lads to weed a 2 acre field of trees not yet big enough to give shade. Some of the weeds were bigger than the trees. This is not a complaint, I'm just setting up a story.
Normally, at the nursery, the most dreaded chore is bagging up a soil mix for sale in the retail garden centre. We sell a lot of the house brand soil mix, because good soil is scarce here, and I have learned from experience that when you buy a bag of 'soil' here that is usually what you get. A bag of mineral soil, with precious little organic matter and no nutrients whatsoever. While our soil is not good composty stuff, it is better than most. But bagging it for sale is a monotonous chore at best, and there are some who theorize that it is actually a punishment when the boss is a little grumpy. Something akin to a cat-o-nine-tails on a 19th Century warship.
After 7 hours of weeding on Monday however, I announced (with a little trepidation, in case it lead to an all out mutiny) that we would be bagging soil for the rest of the day. I guess everything really is relative because their eyes lit up and they actually cheered.

One Reader Writes....

A friend sent me this. The original said "Vancouver" which is just as funny, but I doctored it to this version it to be able to post it at work.

Poor Erica

Last Monday night after the Redwings lost the hockey game in triple overtime, some disgruntled fans decided to take out their frustrations on poor Erica.
Curling Fans would never do this.

Terms of Endearment

and other colloquialisms...

The following are gleaned from lunch room chatter. The translations are mine, from the context they were taken.

Booze Bag - an alcoholic

Fartin' an Spittin' - describing someone who is impatient or angry as in "He was out in the car fartin' an spittin' while I was still in doin' me hair."

Give me left testicle for it - describing how much you would pay for something you really really want.

Got me goin' around like a blue arsed fly - describing how hectic and busy the boss expects you to be.

Jesus in the garden! - an exclamation of surprise or sometimes an oath

Lower than whale poop - very low. I actually heard this on The Hour when General Rick Hillier was interviewed and he was describing the morale of the Canadian military when he took over as Chief.

Never did a big lot - describing someone who in terms of life accomplishments 'didn't do much.'

Shaggin' Around - despite what it sounds like this simply means hanging out or puttering around, hence men can say that on Saturday they were "shaggin' around with the boys."

Small clothes - what you wear to bed

Snottin' an ballin' - crying or whining

True as Christ - very true